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Notes to various - a hockey post
To the NHL PTB: Congratulations! You've got the reunion you wanted. You must be very proud. Yawn!
To the future Conn Smythe winner: You could be Niklas Kronwall for all I care, but if you manage to bean La Bettman with the trophy, you'll be my favorite player EVER. Think about it.
To Niklas Kronwall (while we're on the subject): I hope that Pittsburgh hits you. A LOT.
To the Pittsburgh Penguins: See above message
To the Carolina Hurricanes: What the hell, Carolina? Marc-Andre Fleury isn't Martin Brodeur.
To the Vancouver Canucks: Yes, you're still out. Have a nice day.
To the NHL PTB: Can you honestly not see how boring this is?
To Cristobal Huet & Colin Fraser: You guys played a helluva game 5. Seriously.
To the Chicago Blackhawks PTB: Give Martin Havlat anything he wants. Anything.
To the NHL officials (on behalf of the St. Louis Blues): You know that thing, the one where just thinking about blowing the whistle automatically nullifies the goal? Can you try that during the next round? Particularly on Sidney Crosby during a home game. That would be HI-larious.
To the St. Louis Blues: No, he didn't. Yes, it was. Yes, you would've. Let's move on.
To Mike Babcock: Make an appointment with your eye doctor. Anybody could see that Kronwall left his feet.
To Marian Hossa: Such a dick move, man. Seriously. You think I wanna encourage that shit?
To the guys at NBC/Versus: Let me say it for you. "It's all about (points to Hossa) this man who left his team in Pittsburgh in order to have a chance to win the Stanley Cup with Detroit. Will his gamble pay off?"
To Evgeni Malkin: Consider changing your first name to Evengi, because, honestly, that's what I wind up calling you.
To Dustin Byfuglien: Yeah, we're okay.
To my dad: No, I didn't move the Kings into the Stanley Cup winner position on your standings board. That's just where they wanted to be.
To the Pittsburgh Penguins: Seriously, you guys shouldn't even be there right now.
To the Detroit Red Wings: I'm just glad there's a Central Division team in the Finals, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm rooting FOR you.
To the NHL PTB: If Pittsburgh wins, can we be assured that this matchup never happens again? Cause I might be for that.
To the Chicago Blackhawks: Honestly, I'm so proud of you guys and all you've accomplished this season. Now, you've got something to aspire to next year.
To the twenty-eight teams who are home for the summer and their fans: Fourteen weeks til training camp starts!
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I honestly don't think Bettman was angling for a reunion, he just wanted the Pittsburgh Cindycrosbys in the finals.
To Mike Babcock: Make an appointment with your eye doctor. Anybody could see that Kronwall left his feet.
Now, to cleanse the palate and hopefully prevent de-friending...
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